Dear George,
It’s snap quiz time!
Question: How does a country fight two wars when it’s insolvent?
Answer: With starry-eyed dreamers who feed on their own masturbatory fantasies in the hermetically sealed hothouse we call the Beltway. They are our dark dreamers, implementing policies grounded in the hard data of make believe. To their fervid imaginations, the War on Terror is “real” and they cling to the belief that a combination of bombs, superior firepower and hi-tech weaponry will lead us to victory, just as it did in Vietnam.
It’s that good old American “Can do” spirit on steroids, and it looks as if Obama has bought into their mad clarity of vision.
As one writer put it, “The financial damage inflicted on Americans by their own government is as great as would be expected from foreign conquest. While Washington ‘protected’ us from terrorists by fighting pointless wars abroad, the U.S. economy collapsed.”
I must say, the writer sort of missed the point. The GWOT wasn’t a war, it was a diversionary tactic that directed the drone's attention from the real war—the war on the New Deal.
Part and parcel of this covert war was the backlash against licentiousness that broke out with Ronnie’s ascension to the throne. You carried it a step further when the new propriety became defined as keeping your fly zipped and your panties on while you drowned the screams of the victims with your silence. (We introduced America's teenagers to abstinence education, and they discovered oral sex.)
Another writer speaks of the “emphasis on the shocking rise of promiscuity by American teenage females.” He goes on to say:
This, of course, was a particular point of outrage among old male conservatives of all nationalities, right up until the introduction of Viagra that at least allowed the old geezers an invitation to the orgy as well.
Ironic, then, that, as the conservative era ended in the US in 2008, it culminated with an explosion of permissiveness and irresponsibility that made the free-love hippies of the 1960s look like Southern Baptist preachers. After all, the hippies never cost the American nation over one trillion dollars.
We are all citizens of Orwell’s Oceana, convinced that war simply is, just as the sunrise is. So conditioned are we to this state of mind that a third writer tells us, “The honest truth is that the United States is technically bankrupt and in a state of chronic decline, and yet the nation persists in spending a trillion dollars a year on war and preparations for war, as though America were in danger from foreign enemies.”
That writer has sunk his teeth into a half truth. There are some real enemies out there; we should know because we’ve created them. Ask yourself, what is the ripple effect of a baby whose body parts are scattered across the pavement? How many parents, siblings, aunts, uncles and grandparents does this embitter? How far does this bitterness spread among their friends and acquaintances?
No, George, as long as the Beltway dreams its dreams and lives out its fantasies, your Eternal War will be eternal because we will continue to create enemies as fast as we destroy them.
The Beltway is the new Sorcerer’s Apprentice who can’t stop the spell it's created.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Friday, January 30, 2009
Reinventing our Eternal War on whatever.
Dear George,
Some fear that Latin America is veering to the left and that our influence in the region is waning. They fear that our shattered economy and over extended military is no longer up to the job.
They are wrong.
Even as Latin America moves to the left, it remains mired in the tar pit that is our foreign policy as America’s (ours, not theirs) black angels keep gnawing at the insurgent democracy that threatens a century-long tradition of mutual cooperation and support between their oligarchs and ours.
Do not think for a minute that sixty-plus years of institutionalized paranoia is asleep at the switch. Who needs a threat to feel threatened? Not us. With the Cold War a fading memory and your Eternal War of the Empty Policy losing its panache, we are seeing the emergency of a hybrid that is the new cornerstone of our regional policy.
Yes George, we begin with that bulwark against marijuana madness and crack coitus, The Global War on Drugs. Then we throw in some Islamofascists for good measure, and sprinkle some commies on it to add zest.
What we are seeing is the merging of three separate “wars” in to one big lollapalooza that will keep the lights burning late in the Pentagon as the geeks tally up their latest appropriation.
One writer reassures us that “the Bush administration is on the alert to Iran’s presence in Latin America…This puts into context Washington’s evidence-lacking assertions that the Tri-Border Area, where Brazil, Paraguay and Argentina meet, is a hub for Islamic Terrorists groups such as Hezbollah and Hamas.”
I have no doubt these terrorists are in daily contact with the Russians and the Chinese, whose influence is also growing in the region. The Russians are conducting joint naval exercises with Venezuela, which one alert official compared to the Cuban missile crisis, and China just bought a Peruvian copper mine.
But all is not lost. As the above writer tells us, “But because of the deeply embedded and institutionalized nature of Washington’s imperial machine, it doesn’t matter which party controls the White House and Congress.” The shit will keep rolling down hill.
There are lamentations that our problems in Latin America are blowback from our rather exploitive treatment of the region. However, what some call blowback is simply good policy, and if a couple of airplanes fly into a couple of buildings, it is a small price to pay for our robust national security that has created a business-friendly environment for America’s transnational corporations.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Some fear that Latin America is veering to the left and that our influence in the region is waning. They fear that our shattered economy and over extended military is no longer up to the job.
They are wrong.
Even as Latin America moves to the left, it remains mired in the tar pit that is our foreign policy as America’s (ours, not theirs) black angels keep gnawing at the insurgent democracy that threatens a century-long tradition of mutual cooperation and support between their oligarchs and ours.
Do not think for a minute that sixty-plus years of institutionalized paranoia is asleep at the switch. Who needs a threat to feel threatened? Not us. With the Cold War a fading memory and your Eternal War of the Empty Policy losing its panache, we are seeing the emergency of a hybrid that is the new cornerstone of our regional policy.
Yes George, we begin with that bulwark against marijuana madness and crack coitus, The Global War on Drugs. Then we throw in some Islamofascists for good measure, and sprinkle some commies on it to add zest.
What we are seeing is the merging of three separate “wars” in to one big lollapalooza that will keep the lights burning late in the Pentagon as the geeks tally up their latest appropriation.
One writer reassures us that “the Bush administration is on the alert to Iran’s presence in Latin America…This puts into context Washington’s evidence-lacking assertions that the Tri-Border Area, where Brazil, Paraguay and Argentina meet, is a hub for Islamic Terrorists groups such as Hezbollah and Hamas.”
I have no doubt these terrorists are in daily contact with the Russians and the Chinese, whose influence is also growing in the region. The Russians are conducting joint naval exercises with Venezuela, which one alert official compared to the Cuban missile crisis, and China just bought a Peruvian copper mine.
But all is not lost. As the above writer tells us, “But because of the deeply embedded and institutionalized nature of Washington’s imperial machine, it doesn’t matter which party controls the White House and Congress.” The shit will keep rolling down hill.
There are lamentations that our problems in Latin America are blowback from our rather exploitive treatment of the region. However, what some call blowback is simply good policy, and if a couple of airplanes fly into a couple of buildings, it is a small price to pay for our robust national security that has created a business-friendly environment for America’s transnational corporations.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Thursday, January 29, 2009
The guy is learning!
Dear George,
Obama is learning. His administration has announced that Hamas will not be a part of the peace process. We must teach uppity natives that it's dangerous to play at democracy.
As one writer pointed out, “The Gaza debacle has made one thing perfectly clear: any peace process that seeks to marginalize, not integrate, Hamas is doomed to fail—and with catastrophic consequences.”
Hell! That’s what we want, Big Guy—catastrophic consequences!
The Middle East peace process is a subtle exercise in which the sole objective is to avoid peace at all costs. There are but two conditions for peace in the Middle East: the complete annihilation of the Palestinians, and the restoration to Israel of all the lands promised it in the Bible.
That’s when Christ will return to earth to destroy two-thirds of the Jews in Israel. The only exceptions will be those on His A-list who have embraced Him as their personal savior.
I know this for a fact because the Angel of the Lord explained it all to me the last time I was stoned.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Obama is learning. His administration has announced that Hamas will not be a part of the peace process. We must teach uppity natives that it's dangerous to play at democracy.
As one writer pointed out, “The Gaza debacle has made one thing perfectly clear: any peace process that seeks to marginalize, not integrate, Hamas is doomed to fail—and with catastrophic consequences.”
Hell! That’s what we want, Big Guy—catastrophic consequences!
The Middle East peace process is a subtle exercise in which the sole objective is to avoid peace at all costs. There are but two conditions for peace in the Middle East: the complete annihilation of the Palestinians, and the restoration to Israel of all the lands promised it in the Bible.
That’s when Christ will return to earth to destroy two-thirds of the Jews in Israel. The only exceptions will be those on His A-list who have embraced Him as their personal savior.
I know this for a fact because the Angel of the Lord explained it all to me the last time I was stoned.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Dancing the Middle East Minuet
Dear George,
I wonder if your successor will be able to dance the Middle East Minuet as well as you did. One thing going for him is having APIAC’s perky blond cheerleader, Hillary Clinton, as secretary of state. But still, it takes a nimble set of feet and deft hands to execute the intricate steps required to keep Israel happy and our oil flowing.
The first thing he must master is the Orwellian use of the word “democracy”. In the Middle East a democracy is a democracy when it’s not a democracy, while a democracy is not a democracy when it is a democracy. I understand you had to write that formula down on a well-worn 3 x 5 card which you kept in your shirt pocket for easy reference.
Then he will have to attend to the care a feeding of the monolith. The bureaucratic paranoia that keeps our defense industry fat and sassy needs a monolith. Threats that are as discrete as they are scattered simply won’t do. A talented policymaker is able to glue thousands of flying gnats together in such a way that he creates a big, brown pulsating monster. This is a skill we learned during the Cold War when we cobbled together the Communist monolith that kept the Great Depression at bay until last year.
Thus it is that Iran, Hezbollah and Hamas are lumped together under the faux category of “Islamofacism”, even though both Hezbollah and Hamas were democratically elected and Iran has more comprehensive elections than our “democratic” allies, Saudi Arabia and Jordon.
That doesn’t stop us from touting Israel as a shining beacon of democracy in the Middle East even though only individuals who belong to the state-approved religion can enjoy full citizenship, which is quite proper since God deeded the land to Abraham.
Irony is the backbone of our foreign policy.
The first thing your successor must do if he is to succeed in the Middle East is lose his integrity. You had an advantage in that you had none when you assumed office. Granted, Obama has taken some important steps in that direction, but he still has a way to go.
Fortunately he has surrounded himself with aides and advisors who will lead him out of the wilderness of integrity and into the promise land of duplicity.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
I wonder if your successor will be able to dance the Middle East Minuet as well as you did. One thing going for him is having APIAC’s perky blond cheerleader, Hillary Clinton, as secretary of state. But still, it takes a nimble set of feet and deft hands to execute the intricate steps required to keep Israel happy and our oil flowing.
The first thing he must master is the Orwellian use of the word “democracy”. In the Middle East a democracy is a democracy when it’s not a democracy, while a democracy is not a democracy when it is a democracy. I understand you had to write that formula down on a well-worn 3 x 5 card which you kept in your shirt pocket for easy reference.
Then he will have to attend to the care a feeding of the monolith. The bureaucratic paranoia that keeps our defense industry fat and sassy needs a monolith. Threats that are as discrete as they are scattered simply won’t do. A talented policymaker is able to glue thousands of flying gnats together in such a way that he creates a big, brown pulsating monster. This is a skill we learned during the Cold War when we cobbled together the Communist monolith that kept the Great Depression at bay until last year.
Thus it is that Iran, Hezbollah and Hamas are lumped together under the faux category of “Islamofacism”, even though both Hezbollah and Hamas were democratically elected and Iran has more comprehensive elections than our “democratic” allies, Saudi Arabia and Jordon.
That doesn’t stop us from touting Israel as a shining beacon of democracy in the Middle East even though only individuals who belong to the state-approved religion can enjoy full citizenship, which is quite proper since God deeded the land to Abraham.
Irony is the backbone of our foreign policy.
The first thing your successor must do if he is to succeed in the Middle East is lose his integrity. You had an advantage in that you had none when you assumed office. Granted, Obama has taken some important steps in that direction, but he still has a way to go.
Fortunately he has surrounded himself with aides and advisors who will lead him out of the wilderness of integrity and into the promise land of duplicity.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Where there's a will there's a way, sometimes.
Dear George,
There is no doubt that your administration cut across the night sky like a dying meteorite whose stench still lingers in the air. What gave it its brilliance was the deftness with which it put ideology before reality.
If an ideology is heartfelt, then reality will conform to it, if one’s will and character are strong enough. When reality fails to conform to ideology, the fault lies not with the ideology but with a lack of will and character.
A strong will is the product of a strong character, one that possesses a pared down intellect whose laser-like sharpness sees only what it wants to see. It is an intellect that can afford to ignore history because it creates history. It is an intellect that transcends petty partisan differences. Conservatives and liberals, Republican and Democrats are equally seduced by it.
A strong will eschews nuance and subtleness because both are simply weakness by another name.
Because the will creates history, it can afford to ignore both consequences and blowback. A policy is not judged by its results, but by how well it hews to the ideological premises that gave it birth.
We are where we are today because your will was strong and pure, and the pinprick sharpness of your intellect was barely visible to the naked eye.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
There is no doubt that your administration cut across the night sky like a dying meteorite whose stench still lingers in the air. What gave it its brilliance was the deftness with which it put ideology before reality.
If an ideology is heartfelt, then reality will conform to it, if one’s will and character are strong enough. When reality fails to conform to ideology, the fault lies not with the ideology but with a lack of will and character.
A strong will is the product of a strong character, one that possesses a pared down intellect whose laser-like sharpness sees only what it wants to see. It is an intellect that can afford to ignore history because it creates history. It is an intellect that transcends petty partisan differences. Conservatives and liberals, Republican and Democrats are equally seduced by it.
A strong will eschews nuance and subtleness because both are simply weakness by another name.
Because the will creates history, it can afford to ignore both consequences and blowback. A policy is not judged by its results, but by how well it hews to the ideological premises that gave it birth.
We are where we are today because your will was strong and pure, and the pinprick sharpness of your intellect was barely visible to the naked eye.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Monday, January 26, 2009
The Tao of Idleness
Dear George,
I got quite a hoot out of the "Styles" section of Sunday’s Times. Once again, the main stream media does a shocking expose of the obvious.
The headline that caught my attention read, “Working Hard To Look Busy.” It seems employees are engaging in a lot of useless activity just to look busy so their bosses will think they’re essential to the operation. The story explains that, “Looking busy when you’re not in order to fool the boss can be something of an art form.”
Duh!
Welcome to service and finance capitalism where work has little or nothing to do with productivity. In order to explain this, Big Guy, I’ve got to run a little history past you, so stay awake!
When capitalism raised its ugly head, one of the first things it did was redefine the concept of work. In traditional agrarian societies work was task oriented. If there was a specific task to be done, such as planting or harvesting, you worked your ass off from dawn to dusk. Once the task was finished, you goofed off
The same was true for artisans who would keep their shops open until they’d made a little money. Then they’d close up and party until the money ran out.
Well, capitalists decided this work ethic sucked since they couldn’t have workers coming and going as they pleased. So, under their guidance work became time oriented. In other words, you worked a set number of hours per day regardless of the number of tasks that needed completion.
That was when teachers started bitching at their students about being on time.
In a straight manufacturing economy, work kept something of its agrarian focus since factories actually made things. However, the radical change came when corporations grew in complexity and as service and finance capitalism started squeezing out manufacturing.
As corporations became more complex, they added additional layers of management. Often time, a layer would be created for a specific project, but once the project was finished the layer remained through sheer inertia, so activities had to be created to justify its existence.
Thus was born Parkinson’s Law that work so as to fill the time available for its consumption, along with its corollary that data expands to fill the space available for its storage.
I can tell you from experience that doing something to conceal the fact that you’re doing nothing can be stressful, but, hell, you’ve known that for most of your life.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
I got quite a hoot out of the "Styles" section of Sunday’s Times. Once again, the main stream media does a shocking expose of the obvious.
The headline that caught my attention read, “Working Hard To Look Busy.” It seems employees are engaging in a lot of useless activity just to look busy so their bosses will think they’re essential to the operation. The story explains that, “Looking busy when you’re not in order to fool the boss can be something of an art form.”
Duh!
Welcome to service and finance capitalism where work has little or nothing to do with productivity. In order to explain this, Big Guy, I’ve got to run a little history past you, so stay awake!
When capitalism raised its ugly head, one of the first things it did was redefine the concept of work. In traditional agrarian societies work was task oriented. If there was a specific task to be done, such as planting or harvesting, you worked your ass off from dawn to dusk. Once the task was finished, you goofed off
The same was true for artisans who would keep their shops open until they’d made a little money. Then they’d close up and party until the money ran out.
Well, capitalists decided this work ethic sucked since they couldn’t have workers coming and going as they pleased. So, under their guidance work became time oriented. In other words, you worked a set number of hours per day regardless of the number of tasks that needed completion.
That was when teachers started bitching at their students about being on time.
In a straight manufacturing economy, work kept something of its agrarian focus since factories actually made things. However, the radical change came when corporations grew in complexity and as service and finance capitalism started squeezing out manufacturing.
As corporations became more complex, they added additional layers of management. Often time, a layer would be created for a specific project, but once the project was finished the layer remained through sheer inertia, so activities had to be created to justify its existence.
Thus was born Parkinson’s Law that work so as to fill the time available for its consumption, along with its corollary that data expands to fill the space available for its storage.
I can tell you from experience that doing something to conceal the fact that you’re doing nothing can be stressful, but, hell, you’ve known that for most of your life.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Living the Tradition
Dear George,
The true test of a great leader is his ability to scam. I.F. Stone once said that all a journalist has to remember are two words, “Governments lie.” This could explain why journalism is a dead science.
My big concern is that your successor isn’t as adept at scamming as you were. You weren’t just a great leader; you were a miracle who kept your credibility in tact through eight years of pure bullshit. Great liars are those who are believed even when people know they are lying through their teeth.
Often, the greatest liars are born hoddypeaks.
There are two scams you successor must keep alive and fresh. First, that capitalism and freedom are two peas in a pod, and second, that the United States has a divinely appointed mission to spread capitalism and freedom to the world, whether it wants it or not.
Our leaders are fortunate that history is too long term for those who live in the “now”. For the truth is that capitalism and democracy are mutually exclusive. Capitalism needs political oppression to thrive. America is the capitalist powerhouse it is because nineteenth century mayors, governors and presidents were willing to dispatch police and troops to beat and gun down labor agitators.
Granted, we had a little setback during the Great Depression, but thanks to you, capitalism has managed to recoup its losses. We can only pray that your successor will continue this trend, though it makes little difference what he wants since Congress is a corporate employee.
The only people who see through these scams are our marginalized radicals. One such radical, Michael Parenti, puts it this way:
Capitalist rulers continue to pose as the progenitors of democracy even as they subvert it, not only at home but throughout Latin America, Africa, Asia and the Middle East. Any nation that is not “investor friendly,” that attempts to use its land, labor, capital, natural resources, and markets in a self-developing manner, outside the dominion of transnational corporate hegemony, runs the risk of being demonized and targeted as “a threat to U.S. national security. Democracy becomes a problem for corporate America not when it fails to work but when it works too well.
The Department of Defense isn’t about defense; it’s about marketing.
You are the gold standard for great leadership. I only hope your successor can carry on your tradition.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
The true test of a great leader is his ability to scam. I.F. Stone once said that all a journalist has to remember are two words, “Governments lie.” This could explain why journalism is a dead science.
My big concern is that your successor isn’t as adept at scamming as you were. You weren’t just a great leader; you were a miracle who kept your credibility in tact through eight years of pure bullshit. Great liars are those who are believed even when people know they are lying through their teeth.
Often, the greatest liars are born hoddypeaks.
There are two scams you successor must keep alive and fresh. First, that capitalism and freedom are two peas in a pod, and second, that the United States has a divinely appointed mission to spread capitalism and freedom to the world, whether it wants it or not.
Our leaders are fortunate that history is too long term for those who live in the “now”. For the truth is that capitalism and democracy are mutually exclusive. Capitalism needs political oppression to thrive. America is the capitalist powerhouse it is because nineteenth century mayors, governors and presidents were willing to dispatch police and troops to beat and gun down labor agitators.
Granted, we had a little setback during the Great Depression, but thanks to you, capitalism has managed to recoup its losses. We can only pray that your successor will continue this trend, though it makes little difference what he wants since Congress is a corporate employee.
The only people who see through these scams are our marginalized radicals. One such radical, Michael Parenti, puts it this way:
Capitalist rulers continue to pose as the progenitors of democracy even as they subvert it, not only at home but throughout Latin America, Africa, Asia and the Middle East. Any nation that is not “investor friendly,” that attempts to use its land, labor, capital, natural resources, and markets in a self-developing manner, outside the dominion of transnational corporate hegemony, runs the risk of being demonized and targeted as “a threat to U.S. national security. Democracy becomes a problem for corporate America not when it fails to work but when it works too well.
The Department of Defense isn’t about defense; it’s about marketing.
You are the gold standard for great leadership. I only hope your successor can carry on your tradition.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
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