Most of us have had the experience, at one time or another in our lives, of hating someone with a passion that borders on the homicidal. This passion runs especially deep if the object or our hatred had hurt us or a person dear to us. The hatred comes in waves every time he or she is mentioned. Sometimes it washes over us in the wee hours of the morning and we find ourselves wide awake playing and replaying old grievances.
The problem is that while this passion consumes us and borders on the self-destructive, it doesn’t touch the object of our loathing. He or she continues along their merry way untouched by our hatred.
Here is a rather bizarre suggestion that might help neutralize this passion and allow us to move from day to day with a little more serenity.
When you wake up in the morning, conjure up the object of your hatred. Review in your mind every undesirable characteristic, every wrong he or she committed. Meditate on every mannerism you despise and every physical characteristic you find loathsome. And when your rage is all consuming drop to your knees, clasp your hands and pray the following prayer.
“God, please bless this low-life, mother-fucking son of a bitch!” Hell, don’t pray it scream it at the top of your lungs. Add a few more adjectives if it suits you.
The next morning, do the same thing. And keep doing it morning after morning.
In time, you will drop the “low-life” and the prayer will become, “God, please bless this mother-fucking son of a bitch!”
As more time passes, and if you are faithful, you will drop the “mother-fucking.”
Then, one day, you will drop the “son of a bitch.”
And on that day, you will be free.
It’s bizarre, but it works.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
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One of the most profound teachings I've necountered, offered by The Dalai Lama, concerns the ability to see even your deepest enemy as a spiritual blessing. Encountering these "enemies", he says, teaches us the virtues of patience, humility and compasssion.
Very true, and praying for their sorry asses helps a great deal.
Because when you pray first you lose the "sorry" and then you lose the "asses."
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