Our Civic Minded Thieves

Dear George,

To those who say you are dumb as dishwater I say, "Fah and be gone!" Your keen intelligence told you that your optimum strategy as our economy gave a new meaning to the China Syndrome, was to hide in your Oval Office and let Paulson take the heat for his bailout plan.

And, what a bailout plan it is! The plan shatters the fetters of crony capitalism to scale the heights of kleptocratic capitalism. The corruption of the nineteenth century’s Robber Barons pales beside Paulson’s Scam.

Paulson was a logical choice to engineer the heist. Under his direction, Treasury has completed its transformation into South Wall Street, so it was only natural that it be the one to come to the aid of its cronies on North Wall Street.

The bailout plan is pure incest. Just look at how it’s going to be implemented. The first thing Paulson does is hire two dozen of his buddies from North Wall Street to be responsible for the overall administration of the plan and to oversee the North Wall Street investment firms that will be hired to administer the plan.

It is a tribute to Congress’ corrupt incompetence that it has given the thieves leave to supervise the stolen property. If there is an icon for this incompetence, it has to be the photograph of Nancy Pelosi, standing at a podium with her Stepford Wife grin, to announce the plan’s passage.

There is but one step yet to take to transform the bailout into a total farce, and that is to hire Al “Don’t-Blame-Me” Greenspan to oversee the operation.

Whoops!

I just realized that I used a word you might not be familiar with—kleptrocracy. It means, rule by thieves. It pretty well sums up your legacy.

Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones