As you may have gathered I get off on madness, just as you do, which is why you and the Big Dick make such a bang-up team.
There is nothing like a raving madman to set my follicles atwittering. A crazed mob is even better, but the crème de la crème is a crazed nation. That, Big Guy, is Valhalla!
All madness is made up of two components: delusion and exceptionalism. Madness liberates itself from reality by creating an imaginary parallel universe, a universe teeming with threats and dangers. Madness is also convinced of its exceptionalism. Not only does madness believe in its own sanity, it also believes that it is the only entity with the clarity of vision necessary to understand the world around it. Because it occupies a higher level of reality, it believes that its way and its view are interface perfectly with the Devine Will.
When an individual behaves in this manner, he is committed; when a nation behaves in this manner, it starts a war. The public easily recognizes madness in the individual, but they never see it in their own nation, though they are quick to see it in other nations. The madman believes all other individuals to be mad; the citizens of an insane nation believe all other nations mad.
To the mad nation, delusion is truth, the imaginary is real and threats are on the cusp of destroying civilization as the mad nation defines it.
The pathological nation sees itself as representing the end product of the evolutionary process (or as God’s chosen in the case of Creationists). In this light, its every act, no matter how brutal, is right and moral. So noble are its ends that it is justified using the vilest of means to achieve them.
This is why it imperative that we destroy that most pathological of nations, Iran. Delusion and exceptionalism drives it. If you listen carefully you can hear them sharpening their knives as they hatch their plans to destroy Capitalism and achieve world domination. Forget the NIE that said Iran has suspended its nuclear weapons program. The very fact that they could possibly develop nuclear weapons meets the Big Dick’s one-percent doctrine (If there is a one percent probability a nation will be a threat that is sufficient reason to take action against said nation.
Muslims have no qualms about bombing innocent women and children, and it is a fact that Iran’s goal is to spread its Tehran consensus across the face of the earth as it establishes its world-wide caliphate. This is not paranoia, George, it is policy. As the moral beacon of the world, the United States is justified to use any means at its disposal to maintain world order and stability, even if we have to sacrifice peace to do so.
You have the perfect sound bite: If Iran gets nuclear weapons; it will destroy Israel (The fact that Iran has never made this threat makes your sound bite even juicier. All Iran has said is that the present regime that occupies Jerusalem will vanish from the pages of history. They were talking about the natural flow of history in which all power eventually crumbles and turns to dust, as we are beginning to find out. Notice how many words it took me to explain this. That’s the beauty of sound bites; they don’t tax the listener’s crippled attention span. “Iran wants to destroy Israel.” That is all the public needs to know.)
It is our mission to restore sanity to the world, and if we have to get a little crazy doing so, it is a small price to pay. When the radioactive dust settles and all of the cluster bombs have been detonated, we will be left with a world so mad everyone will think it sane.