Together Again!

Dear George,

I tried, Big Guy, God knows I tried. I did my damndest to break in the new kid, but it just wasn’t the same. How do you teach evil to the innocent, or corruption to the honest? My words lacked their sniveling bite when writing him.

Please forgive some of the negative comments I made about your administration. As you know, politics is the art of kissing up.

The important thing is that we are together again, and you still have thirty-eight days to secure you legacy.

And from the looks of it, your greatest legacy could well be breaking the back of the United Auto Workers (UAW), a union that has distorted the hierarchical relationship between management and labor.

Seventy dollars an hour for an assembly line worker, my ass!

What right does a prole have to a living wage? Who said he’s entitled to a house in the burbs? (God, it feels good writing you! There was something about the other guy that made it difficult to vent my God-fearing, White guy bile.)

God bless Senator Bob Corker for his principled stand in demanding that big-three autoworkers be granted parity with American workers in Japanese plants. Unless big-three autoworkers are willing to sacrifice, their companies might be forced to cut the executive salaries of the retards that ran their companies into the ground. This would be a terrible mistake, because if a CEO fails to destroy his company, he can't benefit from an infusion of taxpayer dollars.

I look forward to the day when a proper social order is restored to America and her workers all live in cold-water flats and tenements. Nothing gives a nation color like Dickensian poverty.

It’s great to be home, again. Give my love to the Big Dick and tell him that I miss his sneering face on the tube. I hope he’s off somewhere stirring up another pot of shit.

With you in office, thirty-eight days is an eternity.

Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones